"I am NOT Daniel Tosh!"

 Notes From Lane Kiffin's Game Day Appearance, brought to you by collegefootballmock.com:

 “After all the things I did wrong, from deflating footballs, to switching jersey numbers on players during games, to walking out on the media 30 seconds into a press conference, to lying about who I voted #1 in the Coaches Poll, to burying my face in my play chart during games, to losing the locker room, to hiring my Dad as a defensive coordinator and on and on and on, I still felt like I deserved a 19th chance to turn it around,” Kiffin told ESPN’s Game Day host Chris Fowler. “19 is the charm, they say. And in spite of my players clearly quitting on me and begging our athletic director to fire me, I felt we were on the precipice of having a really special season.”


All in all, The Smack has a pretty successful week predicting the outcomes of several enjoyable college football games.  Aside from putting too much faith in a couple of service academies, I'm proud of my record.

San Diego State 27, Air Force 20.  Am unable to watch this game because even the "Premier" level of our Verizon package doesn't include CBSS.  So while I slum on the deciding game of the Detroit-Oakland playoff series, the Falcons squander what is likely to be their last opportunity for a win in the next two weeks.  After QB Quinn Kahler throws to WR Eric Judge for an early score, the Air Force defense blocks the PAT, and scores the next 20 unanswered points. Down by two touchdowns entering the 4th quarter, Aztec rally begins when their defense forces a punt and on the next series gets a 3-and-out.  Kahler capitalizes on both, tossing two more TD passes in the last twelve minutes.  House Republicans bemoan lack of defense spending.

USC 38, Arizona 31.  It isn't pretty, but it is a W for the Trojans.  Marqise who?  Star of the night is WR Nelson Agholor who hauls in seven Cody Kessler throws for 161 yds. and a TD.  Oh, and that's Lee grinning on the sideline in civvies.  Silas Redd also returns to the lineup and makes good with 80 yds. rushing, as USC races to a 28-3 lead and then is forced to hold on for dear life as Arizona rallies only to fall just short.  Wildcat QB B. J. Denker throws for 363 yds. and four scores, two of them legitimate bombs.  As the Trojan defense begins to unravel toward the end of the game, the offense is left to pick up a much-needed 1st down and keep Arizona's offense off the field.  Following the game, interim coach Ed Orgeron immediately orders the reinstatement of Crunchy Cheetos to training table.

Union 35, Worcester Polytech 6.  Break up the Dutchmen, we're 2-0 in our last two games!  Even I pay too much attention to how our teams score their points, so this week credit where credit is due.  The stars for Union include Thomas Hayes with12 tackles, and Jake La Rovera who adds seven.  Union holds Engineers scoreless in the 1st quarter and the entire second half.  All told, Garnet have allowed just 23 second-half points in its five games.  Bring on Baylor!!

Army 50, Eastern Michigan 25.  On the other hand, one can't ignore a record-setting performance like the one turned in by Army's Terry Baggett.  Baggett rolls up 304 yds. of rushing by himself, breaking The Point's record which has stood for 14 years.  His four TDs also tie the existing record for second-most via the ground.  As a team, the Black Knights average 9.5 yds./carry on the way to 513 yards in total rushing.  QB Angel Santiago has 36 yds. on the ground and another 38 through the air, as Eastern drops its fifth straight game.  Cadets already looking forward to November 2nd.

Duke 35, Navy 7.  The Blue Devils' QB Anthony Boone exploits the Navy secondary by throwing three TD passes en route to the lopsided victory.  Once again the Middies' offense is missing, especially QB Keenan Reynolds, who is held to just 31 yds. on 16 carries.  While it's Navy who usually holds the advantage in time of possession, Dookies keep the ball for 35 minutes and Goats are only able to muster 230 yards of rushing.  Beginning to envision this year's Army-Navy game...

Georgia Tech mascot

BYU 38, Georgia Tech 20.  Just when opponents think they can beat Cougars by stopping QB Taysom Hill from running the ball, he turns to his receivers and...lights out.  Hill still gets his game-high 87 yards on the ground, but it's his 244 yards through the air that overwhelm the Yellowjackets.  Despite having the ball for nearly 37 minutes of the game, Tech gets just 242 yds of rushing which, for a triple option team, is simply not enough.  Hence bees get flattened for third week in a row (see right).

Oregon 45, Washington 24.  One feature of Oregon's offensive power is its ability to strike quickly.  Case in point:  following a Washington touchdown, it takes the Ducks only three plays to  score on a 57-yard pass from QB Marcus Mariotta to WR Josh Huff.  Overall, Mariotta goes 24-for-31 and 366 yds, plus another 88 on the ground.  Another Duck quality is the ability to turn adversity into gain.  After being stopped on a 4th-and-five early in the game, Oregon forces the Huskies to go 3-and-out before taking eight plays to score from their own 23 yardline.  Says U-Dub coach Steve Sarkisian, "They're a good football team."

Troy 35, Georgia State 28.  A "good football team" is NOT what we call 0-6 Georgia State.  But that record doesn't tell the entire story, as the Panthers lead the ballgame twice, and take Troy down to the wire before allowing a 54-yard Corey Robinson-to-Chris Williams strike with under 4:00 minutes to go.  State's defense just gives up too much yardage (644 on the day vs. Troy) and too many big plays to rescue what is turning into a decent little offense.  Although QB Ronnie Bell completes only 44% of his passes, he does manage to throw four balls for TDs.  Maybe we're seeing a team in need of a couple more years of FBS competition before it makes noise.

Damn those unpredictable, hormonal teens.  Wait'll you see how wrong, wrong, wrong I was about our preps...

Scarborough's Dan "Money" LeClair

Scarborough 58, South Portland 57 (2OT).  I've heard of "40 minutes of hell", which was the '93 Arkansas Razorback NCAA basketball champions' war cry.  But according to Steve Stinson, the Riots "...spotted [Scarborough] 24 minutes of intensity."  Down 21 in the second quarter, South Portland manages to battle back to tie the game with just 32 ticks remaining in regulation.  At the end of the second OT, Red Storm coach Lance Johnson calls for a two-point conversion on a "jet sweep" (end-around) Scarborough hasn't used all year to snatch victory.  As expected, RB Dan LeClair is money, with 198 yds. on 28 carries, with QB Ben Greenberg adding 24 rushes for 200 yds.

Rogers 34, Kentwood 33 . BOOM!  Kentwood is knocked from the ranks of the unbeaten.  A 95-yard LaGrant Pegram punt return breaks a second-quarter tie and fires up the Ram defense, which stalls Conquerors twice, forcing field goals instead of allowing touchdowns.  Once again QB Grayson Madland comes up big, running for one TD and throwing the 25-yard game-winner to Kyleer Oooley.